Part I

Asking about anything I have in ma mind, anything which can be called as a question… after clearing about all my ambiguity about university subjects there comes a question from the replier. Vildan, is there anything I can help u about?

I am such a “pollyanna” that I can not think about sth. Literally I either believe it or reckon it…no other way…

So ma mind keeps tracking all the hints tied to any questional vain from literature to economy; from science to politic…In the end, I smile as to find my roots in religion. Ups ups ups…

Just one story to enlighten me as a whole…

_do u know ashara-ı mubasshara?

_yep, sir. They are the people who are already told to be in paradise while living in this world.

_do u know Ibn-i …?

_I dont know if u ask his exact features, sir.

_he was one of the ashara-i mubassharah. And after hearing about his event, people kept following the tricks of his life so as to get how people can be in paradise even before their death. They could not understanding how he was chosen coz he was sleeping during the night and eating during the day when he could fing a food. So he was not actually worshipping non-stop. Then they could not help asking him what the gist of him? The answer was the shortest but the hardest maybe due to our ability to practise.

_I ve never spoken after any people.

The most problematic issue of Wildaanun muhalladuuyn is that “ramour”, which actually has a smoothy surface letting people into sin without realising in any place at anytime in an easy and practical way.

Part II

Bringing back my memoirs of the first year in university.

_heyyy, Vildan may you tell me what that teacher is telling?

_yup, guess he is calling asia as “aşhya”, and over as “ovva” and other as “ada”.

_What you are talking about in my classroom? You are just given Money and made to go to the university without any hardship. And do you read what I am talking about? If you keep talking like that I will not only kick you out of the room but also not let you join my other courses so that you should fail and pay one more year to that university, we need Money u know ( steppin one more pace for every single sentence)

Nothing left for me other then breathing and trying to change the color of ma face…after some time I needed to get injected B12 due to the crash in ma mind about all staff including my scholarship, his attitude before the peole…( around 12 time till my cells are developed into the should be level, between the courses due to lacking time and I was also tutoring a student in prep school)

I could not help crying over the shoulder of my people and it was hard not to speak about “him”. And I also actually knew about my responsibilities which made me go find his office and ask for his pardon. ( we, muslims need to go to the other world all recovered from our illnesses and there are some which can not be healed by God, but it needs the people we link while sinning ourselves)

Yep, I was in the room trying to find the right word for begging his pardon coz there was not close phrases in eng. About that specific function of the language and for that certain event.

Realizing he also knew Arabic at that time, I could get the help of some words in Arabic. He was just shocked after hearing all about my doctoral process and the injection due to psychological break. He explained me all his motto in just some clear sentences.

_you are all paid by ur family here and they (the others) do not really care about their family and also they should realize what opportunities they actually have without trying hard and that is my responsibility (teaching) before God if I am a teacher. How I could answer if he asks me about my time and the situation of the people in the classroom in terms of knowledge?

I was just shocked to see him got shocked and after that little conversation, we have spoken nearly three hours I don’t remember exactly.

And since that time, I was smiling whenever I drop by in his office feeling like I have just been to the time of our prophet and maybe have had a conversation with Omar and Abu Bakr at the same time. Omar in class, Abu bakr in his office, I am grateful to have you here as our head of department. (Mohammed Abu Bakr Bakari)

He was also the one who cried with me about my most blessed and biggest exam including my, my sister’s and mom’s “life”…………

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